Mother's Day is not really a celebration

Daddy works A LOT.

Oh really?

Yes he does. He works all the time!

Where does he work?

At home and at work.

Does Mommy work a lot?

You work too. But not a lot.

And that’s when I realized that, at face value, my “work” (efforts, care, sacrifices, etc.) are not recognized enough and will not be for the next 10 to 15 years among my children. By then, these little grown-up, teenage monsters will be too pissed off at something I’ve done to appreciate my existence, let alone my valuable sacrifices.

Mother’s Day. A day that means nothing to me as a mother but everything as a daughter. Dinner with both my own mother and my mom-in-law, plus small gifts of appreciation, was where our efforts concentrated. After all, where would we be if not for the free time donated by these lovely women who think everything of our offspring but not much more of us? They should really call it Grandmother’s Day.

Does Mother’s Day mean anything to anyone anymore? Theoretically, it’s an occasion for us to teach our kids why the day exists, why moms are important, and be thankful for all that they’ve done. Commercially, it’s time to take out the plastics and swipe up some nice gifts. But what does it really mean and what can moms expect on this special day? Is it a day off for us? Can we drop everything at home and do anything or nothing that we want? Can we say “no” to breastfeeding a baby on Mother’s Day, or “Go away” to kids who needs help wiping their bums, or put up a sign that reads “Come back tomorrow” and stay in bed to catch up on the thousands of hours lost during the early years of parenthood?

For me, none of those options were available to me. On Mother’s Day, I still had to be everyone’s alarm clock, dress and clean little humans that don’t take my surname, come up with some breakfast options, and shuffle them off to extra-curricular activities that I paid for all the while nagging and wiping their runny noses.

My only gift? A plant with some radish seeds that Mister Almost 4 quickly put together at daycare. He had no idea why he had to do it but the idea of bringing home dirt and seeds and spraying water into the pot was a good enough reason for him. That pot is now outside with the tiny fruit flies it generated.

Anyway none of that matters. It’s not about the presents. Or the day that I wanted to take off and do nothing mom-related (while having the peace of mind that my children are in safe hands). It’s about reflecting on how much I have done and how much effort I have put into this mom job, and what I am getting out of it. Is it worth it? Would I do it all over again?

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